I'm not really one of those people. Despite my outward appearance of being bubbly, outgoing, extrovert, confident, I'm not those things. Well, maybe a bit bubbly.
In so many areas of my life, I doubt myself. I wonder "am I really good enough?".
I think a lot of homeschooling parents often wonder "am I doing enough?" and "am I doing a good enough job?" People ask me how it's going, and I bubble "oh great, it's really working for us!" and on the whole it is. But I continually second-guess myself if I'm doing "enough" or if I could be doing it better.
I love my little blog. I have core readers and commenters who I adore (even though I haven't met most of you), so I know it resonates with at least some people out there. Is it good enough to go on blog hops and be linked to by other people? Is the content good enough for others to read? Does anyone really care about my kids and my family and my existential woes?
I'm a pretty competent employee. I know lots of stuff (teaching stuff, environmental stuff, business stuff). I can do lots of things (teaching, guiding, computer-ey things). But am I good enough to step up - to take on the bigger, better roles? Do I even want to? Is it too self-centred to even consider at the moment?
I'm a reasonably good writer. I have experience that I could share with other people, that could make their lives easier. Would people actually pay $$$ for my words and ideas?
Maybe I should lose some weight, dye my hair, eat less junk so I get less pimples (what is with that BTW? I'm 44 years old, for goodness sake!).
OK, I don't even pretend to be a competent housewife. I get us by. We (mostly) have clean, folded, ironed clothes to wear. We (nearly always) have something to eat. My house is (almost never) clean enough if someone "pops in" (please don't).
Sometimes I think it's just me who feels this way - insecure, unconfident (is that even a word?), unsure. Sometimes it feels like everyone else is happy in themselves and it's just me being a worry-wart. But I'm sure it's not...
Do you think you are "good enough"?
Do you suffer moments (days, months) of self-doubt?
Is all this just a pile of doo-doo and I should just suck it up buttercup and get on with cleaning my house?